Last weekend Liz went to Arkansas to visit family, leaving me alone and unsupervised. Anytime she leaves town, she reminds me to behave myself. I’m pretty sure she does this just to be nice, because she certainly doesn’t need to – she knows as well as I do that I don’t have the energy to misbehave anymore.
Category Archives: Funny
Road trip? Awesome! Wake me up when we get there 6
“Road trip.” Are there any two words in the English language that conjure up more excitement, more romance or more mystique than these two? Of course there are! Don’t be stupid.
Next stop, Geezerville — population, me 6
I knew this day was coming. I’d known it for a long time; in fact, there were days when I would swear I could see it on the far horizon. But like turning points will, this one took me by surprise, and I’m kind of shaken. More…
Snakes on a plane? Maybe. Snakes in a church? Uhhh … 6
It’s not unusual to read that Americans don’t worship the way they once did, or about declining church populations, or the growing number of people who describe themselves as “spiritual but not religious” (which, BTW, actually means, “I once read the dust jacket of an Eckhart Tolle book but ended up buying the new Harry Potter.”). More…
Clothing line helps men avoid dressing like colorblind clowns 5
A quick quiz for the guys: You’ve landed a big job interview and you want to look your professional best. Or you’ve got a hot first date and you want to impress her with your mad fashion skillz. Do you know what to wear?
Of course you don’t! You’re a man. Sure, you know how to get dressed; that is, you know that the shirt buttons go in front, and the fat end of the tie should cover up the skinny end, but beyond that and you might as well be a drunken, color-blind gibbon. More…
Béchamel on Super Bowl Sunday? Ten yards for excessive fussiness 9
I’m not much of a football fan but I’m familiar enough with the sport to know it involves a lot of cryptic abbreviations: QB, TD, RBI (OK, that last one doesn’t look right).
Last Sunday, when the biggest football game of the year was being played in New York, my go-to acronym was BFD. While millions of Americans were observing Super Bowl Sunday in countless living rooms and bars across this great nation, I was making a delicate béchamel sauce for the spinach-mushroom lasagna Liz and I would enjoy while watching our favorite soap opera, Downton Abbey.