Tornado, divorce or taxpayer bitching—one way or another, an Okie’s gonna lose that trailer 5

In Oklahoma, if you want your trailer moved all you have to do is wait for spring and a tornado will do it for you (alternatively, you can wait for a divorce, and your ex and her new biker/meth cook boyfriend Skeeter will move it—usually while you’re at work).

trailerBut if you’re the governor and you’ve allowed your daughter to move her trailer onto the grounds of the governor’s mansion there’s a third option  – you can wait until some nosey TV station sends a news crew poking around, feign ignorance that you’re (gasp!) breaking the law and then begrudgingly move it yourself.

Mary Fallin (that almost rhymes with Sarah Palin, but that’s probably just coincidence, much like her arrogance, abrasiveness lack of self-awareness) allowed her 28-year-old daughter, Christina, to move her trailer onto the mansion grounds while she looked for more suitable housing.

A kerfuffle about this cozy arrangement began when some malcontent (who probably voted for Obama) wrote to a TV station asking, “Is it true that Mary Fallin’s daughter is living in a trailer on the Governor’s mansion property? That is state property! Who is paying her bills? Oklahoma taxpayers?”

That the fruit of the Oklahoma governor’s loins (or any other Okie, for that matter) is living in a trailer is not news. What is news – at least to Fallin – is that having your kid’s double-wide sitting on state property and hooked up to city utilities is illegal.

Although the trailer’s presence on the grounds is exempt from city code, it is in violation of state code. The Capitol-Medical Center Improvement Zoning Commission states that a trailer – even the governor’s daughter’s super-special trailer – cannot be kept on certain state property. This includes the mansion.

Fallin claimed ignorance  – and if you know much about her, you know she’s not faking it. “It never dawned on me that a mansion, a governor’s mansion, might be on the Capitol medical zone,” she said. In her defense, she’s only the governor; she can hardly be expected to know the laws of the state she heads and that cover the place where she and at least one free-loading kid live.

Fallin downplayed talk that taxpayers were footing her daughter’s utility bills, telling the TV guys that although the trailer is hooked up to the mansion’s water and electricity, Christina is not using state resources.

“She would be using that electricity if she lived in the house, or if she got a drink of water out of the faucet, or if she flushed a toilet in the house,” she said, apparently unaware of how municipal utilities actually work. Also, she appears to be implying that dropping a hypothetical deuce in the mansion would be cool, but flushing it would not.

“I love my family. My daughter’s terrific … if she says, ‘Hey, mom, I need some help,’ I’m not going to turn her down,” Fallin told the station. “Even if it means breaking the law,” she did not add but clearly believes.

The governor’s office stated that they believe it is perfectly acceptable for the daughter to live in her trailer behind the mansion. Sidebar: one of Christina’s step-brothers is living in an apartment over the garage on the property; so far, no word from the governor’s office on the acceptability of the bong he’s hiding in his underwear drawer.

 

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5 comments

  1. My understanding is Gov Mary gave the capital guard strict orders that if the trailer was rock’n don’t go knock’n. Well at least our governor has a mansion and doesn’t live in a trailer herself. The vote to replace the governor’s former official double-wide with the mansion was very close in the senate. But of course that was along time ago…3 years as I recall.

  2. I can just imagine the fat, orange Home Depot extension cord looping out of the mansion window, running through a tadpole-filled aboveground pool and over a rusted El Camino, then in the living room window of Christina’s double wide. (“Kody, grab the dawg! He’s chewin’ on the dang cord again!”)

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